Sunday, February 6, 2011


I am extremely nervous at the moment. Why you ask? Well, I am starting another new job (yes it too is temporary) tomorrow. is the same job I did last year, at exactly the same company. Anyway, I will be helping out in the wine cellar during the harvest time.

That's not so bad you say? Well it gets really crazy and hectic and I will be working with a lot of the same people, but that could be a challenge. Only difference this time is that there is a new winemaker as well as assistant winemaker. What makes that bad is that winemakers have diva mentalities and last years winemaker really got to me. She made my 5 months at the cellar absolute hell.

So now I guess you could say I am going in for round two. Which I don't feel ready for. I already got a heads up from someone telling me that it is absolutely chaotic there. Last year I was still working on the editing of my first novel and I had been so tired from running around the whole day that for the 5 months I worked there, I didn't do much writing or editing. And you know what the funny part is? I am still working on making my first novel the best that it can be. I just hope I don't neglect it the way I did last year.

I guess I am afraid of my extreme emotional state affecting my writing. It is the one thing I do that allows me to feel as if the harsh reality of the world can't touch me. When I am in my fantasy world I make people come alive. I can have my characters do what I myself can't or let them live the lives most of us can only dream of.

Not quite myself

I have no idea why, but I have not been feeling like myself. Even being in my own skin feels alien.  The good news is that I still managed t...