Monday, March 16, 2015

Connection Problems and Writing Progress

My family and I have been without internet since Friday. Thank goodness I could schedule my Friday post a few days beforehand. Our internet connection was restored late this afternoon and I was so relieved. I can go on vacation and not worry about internet, but when I’m in work or writer mode, I go crazy without internet. I feel like I’m missing out on something.

The past week I have started to establish a type of writing schedule again. I work during the day and at night I write and yes, I have actually been coming up with a lot of new material for my rewrites and painlessly discarding what I wrote last year. The first few nights were tough, because I could barely crank out a thousand words a night and then when the weekend approached, I was writing more than a thousand words a day. It might not sound like much, but for me that is monumental. I know I can only improve on word count.

I recently realized that it wasn’t so much that I didn’t feel inspired, but that my depression was really kicking my ass and my will to write was diminished. Okay, don’t judge me, but with depression the simplest thing like just taking a shower can be a challenge. You have to psyche yourself up just to stick your head out the front door. But the more I’m writing, the better I’m feeling mentally.

My master plan is to get off antidepressants this year and try therapy instead. I hate how the medication makes me feel and it does affect my thought process, so for a writer its hell. I’m doing research on various types of therapy and most importantly, trying to compare costs, so that hopefully I can afford that approach instead. My body and mind doesn’t feel good with all the medication I’m on. I’m at the point where I can’t sleep without medication anymore and I hate that. I want control of my body and health back.

Wow, our internet is slow tonight. So, have a great week everyone!

Not quite myself

I have no idea why, but I have not been feeling like myself. Even being in my own skin feels alien.  The good news is that I still managed t...