Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Saying good-bye to Katie

Katie loved playing inside boxes

Yesterday I had to make one of the hardest decisions of my life. Our family cat, Katie( a.k.a. Katja/ Katja-Minka)  had to be rushed to the vet on Saturday and soon we got the diagnosis that her kidneys were failing. She was kept on a drip all of Saturday and Sunday. Yesterday afternoon the Vet let us know that she wasn't getting better, but worse. So, my brother and I came to the decision to have her put to sleep. There was nothing else they could do for her and I didn't want her to suffer any more. 

It was awful. She no longer looked like our beloved and temperamental cat, but rather weak and frail. Her eyes tried to take in as much as they could. She even tried to get up, but ended up failing each time. In all honesty, her mind and spirit was still strong. After all, Katie was as tough as they came. But her body just couldn't take it anymore, which I found to be the saddest. She wanted to live, but her body couldn't cope. Letting a loved one go, especially one that was like your kid is heart wrenching. Even worse, having to live with the fact that I had her put to sleep feels like an evil act and if I had betrayed her. Like spitting on the 10 years she loved me and my family. 

 Katie sleeping between my mom's plants

Afterwards, we brought her home and buried her in her favorite part of the yard, where she liked to hang out. Even the dogs found saying good-bye to Katie hard. They all grew up and lived together in peace and love and she had been part of their pack . . . Now she was gone. They sniffed at her fragile little body and Abby, the oldest, even nudged her with the nose a few times, but Katie did not move. 

Katie asleep on top of mom's parsley

My Dearest Katie,
Thank you for being my best friend.
Thank you for loving me, 
even though I was the furthest thing from perfect.
Thank you for making me laugh and smile.
Thank you for being born. 
Sorry for the choice I made, 
forcing you to leave my side.
Sorry for the life I took.  
Please, I beg you, forgive me.
I will love you always.
Rest in peace, my love.

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