Hello again my beautiful friends. Thank you so much for all
the love and support I have received the past few weeks. I appreciate it a ton.
I am seeing a therapist every week for my anxiety and
chronic depression (dysthymia), and a psychiatrist as well (she is also very good), but only every other month. I
am still a long way from where I should be, but it is a work in progress and I
am doing much better. Basically, all the crap I had been running from for most
of my life has finally caught up to me and now I have to deal with it. I’m not
ready to talk about what my issues are/ were, but I know one day I will be able
to.
One of the reasons I adore my therapist is that she gets me. The other reason is that she has treated other writers before, which helps. Trust me, it can be hard to
explain the complexity of writing to non-writers. But my therapist understands,
and she is so patient and supportive. She even encouraged me to keep on
blogging, as the awesome friendships and relationships I have built up over
time, is so important and valid. A friend is a friend, whether you only
communicate online or not. I know that now, and I don’t care that other people
think I’m nuts for only having friends online. I haven’t kept on blogging as my
therapist suggested, but hopefully I can get back into it now.
All week last week one of the TV channels had all the Harry Potter movies on, so basically I spent all of last week really immersing myself into Hogwarts and all things Harry Potter. It was so much fun. It was the first time in a long time that I really enjoyed something. Depression sucks the enjoyment out of everything. But not last week:)
Thank you so much again, my wonderful friends. I hope all is
still well with everyone. Let me know how you are in the comments.
Sounds like things are on a good track with an understanding therapist. So glad to hear that. Online friends are great. I can totally understand spending the week immersed in all things Hogwarts. That sounds like fun and sometimes we need to kick back and enjoy the simple things of life. Hope things continue to go in the right direction for you, my friend.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Mason. Harry Potter was just what I needed:) I hope things keep going in the right direction too. Certain days it goes the other way. But I am staying positive at the moment.
DeleteSoon to publish #33
ReplyDeletePrayers and hugs
Congratulations! That is fantastic! Thank you for the well wishes.
DeleteYeh, you're back! Glad to hear you're on a better track and are finding your way again. :)
ReplyDeleteOh, and a Harry Potter marathon does wonders, doesn't it? My husband and I did that a few years ago for the holidays, and it might be time to do it again....
Thank you, Madeline. It was a fantastic marathon. Me and my sisters want to do it again. Usually me and my mom have a The Lord of the Rings Marathon once a year and that is brilliant. It does do wonders:) It made me feel like I was getting life in me again.
DeleteStay with that therapist!
ReplyDeleteWe do get you and want the best for you.
Thank you, Alex. You guys are awesome. And the blogging world does feel like my home. I feel part of something bigger than myself, which I have missed and I still love.
DeleteI'm glad to hear that you're doing much better. Hope that trend continues for you.
ReplyDeleteI, too, love Harry Potter movie marathons. They can always make me smile.
Take care of yourself!
Hugs and good wishes!
Thank you, M.j. I really hope so too.
DeleteI have watched the Harry Potter movies before and never really got into them, I think because I had so much on my mind. But last week my mind was quiet and I could actually appreciate the Harry Potter experience and understand where the love for Hogwarts comes from. I now wish that world was real, as it would have been fun to grow up with magic. It was really enjoyable and fantastic.
Yeah you are back!
ReplyDeleteYes. Thank you, Jennifer. It's nice to know I was missed:)
DeleteI'm glad you're taking care of yourself and seeing a therapist! Have you thought about doing a memoir just for yourself? Something that allows you to write it all down, get it out, and then decide what you want to do with it later?
ReplyDeleteNo, I haven't, Shannon. I have a therapy journal that I write a few things down in. I thought about writing about this entire experience, but not now. I think certain things are still to0 fresh. But definitely one day. Thank you for the wonderful suggestion, Shannon. I might just write that memoir one day.
DeleteHi Murees - it's great that you feel you'd like to think about blogging again - it is a form of writing ... even short snippets which make a story, or something that interests you in tiny bites ... good to see you here and thanks for updating us ... take care and all the best - Hilary
ReplyDeleteThank you, Hilary. The blogging community is definitely something I've missed. I hope to get back into a rhythm, even it is slow at first.
DeleteHey Murees, I'm sad to hear you've been through this as you've been so supportive and cheery for your online friends and bloggers. Sounds like you need to give that back to yourself. Find your light. Know your "darkness" exists - we all have different shades of dark - but focus on bringing your lightness to the world. Sometimes we have to let go of all our personal expectations and just be who we are. Nothing wrong with just being you. Blessings and Peace.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Nancy. You touched on the exact things my therapist and I are working on. Being myself at all times and being unapologetic about it. I have been living in my own darkness for so long, I don't remember the light, but I am fighting hard to find it and letting it shine. Thank you for your support Nancy.
DeleteBaby steps, eh? I'm going to be taking those back into normal life once all my book release excitement is done, but it's been pretty insane around here for about 3 months. I tell you, that's a horse I'm ready to get off. =) Murees, I'm glad you're online and I hope you get the boost you need from all of us who truly adore you. Depression sucks, but you're not alone in this.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Crystal. Wishing you all the bests with your new release.
DeleteThank you! So far it's a party and a half.
DeleteIt is so much better to put yourself out there amongst friends, then to shut yourself off from everyone. Glad you're back, Murees. If and when you're up to it, I strongly suggest guided meditation. It aligns your spirit with your body and quietens your mind. It is a wonderful way to rejuvenate your thoughts because it encourages you to take a break from heavy thinking. If you go to Youtube and type guided meditation, begin with 10 to 15 minutes, and try headphones. I promise it will become easier. At first it's very hard to turn off your thoughts, but in time your body will relax and you'll enjoy the process. You'll even feel lighter.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Joylene. That definitely sounds like a good idea. I've been considering meditation for a while now. My mind is far too busy and noisy and quieting it would help so much.
DeletePeople often dismiss what they don't understand. Writers know your words are a part of your soul, so the readers of those words may know you better than the people you talk to daily. And you're so right...you do have plenty of friends.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Elizabeth.
DeleteHi Murees! It's lovely to hear you are feeling a little better. Take each day as it comes, knowing that there are a lot of people out there/here sending you best wishes. Really pleased you have found a therapist that 'gets you'. Take good care.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Nicola.
DeleteGood for you for taking the steps to see the therapist and doctor. It takes courage to do that! I'm so glad you have found a therapist who "gets you" as you said. I would imagine that makes all the difference.
ReplyDeleteAlso so glad to see you here again. Keep taking care of yourself. *hugs*
Thank you, Julie.
DeleteI'm so glad you have the right therapist for you! It takes courage and something of a miracle to find the right help. Way to go! And, sometimes, we need to rest, escape, and get inspired by fictional characters fighting off their inner and outer demons. I can see how a Harry Potter marathon would be perfect and enjoyable! :) *HUGS*
ReplyDeleteThank you, Tyrean. I appreciate it.
DeleteThis post makes me so unbelievably happy! I'm so so happy you're back and feeling better :)! I think it's great that your therapist understands you so well. A Harry Potter marathon sounds amazing - are you going to see Fantastic Beasts? Take care of yourself, Murees, and have a lovely weekend :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Rachel. I hope to go see Fantastic Beasts. I've been really excited about it. I can always do with more magic:)
DeleteSo happy you're getting the help you need. Bonding with your therapist is important. I've missed some of your recent posts, but I'm glad I wandered back into a positive one. Take care, my thoughts are with you x
ReplyDeleteThank you, Annalisa.
Delete