Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Saying good-bye to Katie

Katie loved playing inside boxes

Yesterday I had to make one of the hardest decisions of my life. Our family cat, Katie( a.k.a. Katja/ Katja-Minka)  had to be rushed to the vet on Saturday and soon we got the diagnosis that her kidneys were failing. She was kept on a drip all of Saturday and Sunday. Yesterday afternoon the Vet let us know that she wasn't getting better, but worse. So, my brother and I came to the decision to have her put to sleep. There was nothing else they could do for her and I didn't want her to suffer any more. 

It was awful. She no longer looked like our beloved and temperamental cat, but rather weak and frail. Her eyes tried to take in as much as they could. She even tried to get up, but ended up failing each time. In all honesty, her mind and spirit was still strong. After all, Katie was as tough as they came. But her body just couldn't take it anymore, which I found to be the saddest. She wanted to live, but her body couldn't cope. Letting a loved one go, especially one that was like your kid is heart wrenching. Even worse, having to live with the fact that I had her put to sleep feels like an evil act and if I had betrayed her. Like spitting on the 10 years she loved me and my family. 


 Katie sleeping between my mom's plants

Afterwards, we brought her home and buried her in her favorite part of the yard, where she liked to hang out. Even the dogs found saying good-bye to Katie hard. They all grew up and lived together in peace and love and she had been part of their pack . . . Now she was gone. They sniffed at her fragile little body and Abby, the oldest, even nudged her with the nose a few times, but Katie did not move. 


Katie asleep on top of mom's parsley

My Dearest Katie,
Thank you for being my best friend.
Thank you for loving me, 
even though I was the furthest thing from perfect.
Thank you for making me laugh and smile.
Thank you for being born. 
Sorry for the choice I made, 
forcing you to leave my side.
Sorry for the life I took.  
Please, I beg you, forgive me.
I will love you always.
Rest in peace, my love.
Good-Bye.

44 comments :

  1. So sorry Murees. I know it's a terrible time for you. Hugs to you.

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  2. Murees, so sorry to hear about Katie (such a beauty). May your memories comfort you during this difficult time. The loss never goes away, but the pain does ease a bit overtime. They are such delightful parts of our family. Sending hugs.

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  3. I'm sorry! That's the hardest thing to do. Her spirit still soars on the other side though.

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  4. Aw. I'm so sorry, Murees! It's never easy to say goodbye to a pet. I had to put my cat Rosie to sleep over a year ago and I still miss her. Katie was pretty. I love the little bit of white on her face that looked like an eyebrow.

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    1. Thank you, Chrys. I know. She also had the cutest little white paws.

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  5. I know you probably won't see this now but you really didn't betray her; you gave her peace. Please take care....

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    1. Thank you, Madeline. I really hope you are right.

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  6. It is always so sad to say goodbye to a beloved pet. The pain just goes on and on, especially when you have to make this decision. But what else could you do? Thinking of you. <3

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  7. I am so so sorry. I can tell you loved her very much. Peace to you and your Katie.
    Ninja Girl

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  8. Aww, I'm so sorry. That's so heartbreaking. All we can do is give our furry friends happy lives and love them all we can...but it's SO hard to say goodbye to them.

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  9. I am so so sorry for your loss. I felt your pain as I read this, Murees. Be gentle with yourself.

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    1. Thank you, Karen. I really am trying to be.

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  10. So, so sorry for you. What a hard moment. I'm sending healing cheese and love.

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  11. I had to put my cat Thomas to sleep because of kidney failure as well and I can relate to how horrible it is to see your beloved pet struggling so much. There's no question you and your brother did the right thing for Katie and your choice was an act of love. She was a beautiful girl and I'm glad she had such a great life with you and your family. Many hugs to you, Murees.

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    1. Thank you, Julie. It was really awful, seeing her struggle like that. She was such an active cat with a big personality. To see her so fragile was hard.

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  12. I'm so, so sorry, Murees. That's such a hard thing to have to go through. And I agree with Madeline—you didn't betray her. Sending hugs and love...

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  13. Hi Murees - so sad losing an animal and so difficult. But I think you all did the best for her - and she's at peace now .. my thoughts to you - Hilary

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  14. I'm so sorry to hear this. It's so hard, but you did the right thing. We had to make a similar decision a couple of years ago xx

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  15. You did the right thing. My brother had cancer, and in the end, he asked us to stop fighting for him. He was tired and in pain. That's from a human who understands why his body is rebelling against him. I imagine for an animal, it just feels like torture. My old dog is 16 and I worry every day that I'll have to make a choice. It's just so unfair. Hugs.

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    1. It is very unfair, not to mention hard. Thank you.

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  16. Murees, I am so, so sorry for both of you. I put down my best four legged friend years ago, after illness, and am still trying to come to grips with it. I wish you both peace and wonderful memories.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5GurFKhK34U
    Rainbow Bridge
    Hugs,
    Sandra

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    1. Thank you so much, Sandra. I am really trying to find peace right now.

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  17. I'm so sorry to hear this Murees :(. Katie looked liked a lovely cat, and she sounds like she was a bit of character! We've had to put down several family dogs over the years due to cancer, and it never gets any easier - but you made the right decision. Katie isn't in pain anymore, and just think of all the years of memories and all the love and affection you gave her while she was with you. Nothing can take away from those special memories :). Sending you much love this month xx

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  18. I'm so sorry for your loss and its so sad. About a month ago we had to say goodbye to our 20 yo Kitty (yes that was her name) And last week Otis, our dog. They are our babies and they give us unconditional love.

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    1. I'm so sorry, Cathrina. Saying goodbye is awful. Wishing you well.

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  19. So sorry to hear about your loss. I understand it can feel like you did something wrong but what you did was right - you gave her a long and happy life.

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  20. Ek's so, so jammer vriendin. Sit hier met trane in my oe. Een van my katte moes ek ook op gee nou. Hy't mos weggeraak in Desember en tot nou toe nie teruggekom nie.

    Nou moes ek hoop op gee, maar dit voel heeltyd of ek hom verraai, veral omdat ek nou aan die einde van die maand moet trek.

    Ai. Dis eintlik erg dat ons so lief vir ons diere is.

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    1. Dankie, Misha. Ek is jammer om te hoor oor jou katjie. Hulle maak ons so lief vir hulle. Wens jou alle sterkte en drukkies toe.

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  21. I am so terribly sorry for your loss. I know how painful it can be. They become our children, our siblings, our safe places. It takes times for the grief to pass. I still miss my fluff that died almost 20 years ago. Eventually, like any grieving process you get to a spot where you look back and see the love and feel the love.My heart goes out to you. You did the right thing. Letting Katie suffer would have been worse. (hug)

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    1. Thank you so much, Sharon. I'm sorry for your loss as well.

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