Monday, May 17, 2010

Life after depression

Today, I officially started my life again, on the clean slate I always wanted. (Not counting the earlier events, as discussed in detail).

Before embracing my love of the written word, I use to be one of those woman who wanted to be super successful and who had their whole life mapped out.
So after finishing high school, I went to college to complete a degree in animal science, which I at the time thought was perfect, because I already had a problem communicating with people then. But at the end of the 1st semester, my dad died and I was left distraught, not to mention that I still had exams to write. So, naturally I did horribly and I was forced to repeat every subject I failed, the following year with all the new 1st years.
So, I started slipping into a depression faze.
I wanted to quit, but my family pushed me to finish. I went back and like expected, it was horrible, for 4 years I had to put up with people trying to humiliate me and insult me. But after 4 years, I finally got my degree.
My depression started to lift, slightly.
Then my depression returned full steam, as I was unable to obtain full time employment for 3 years.
During the three years I had to do all sorts of temporary jobs, that were not in my field of expertise and that paid very little and that were at the bottom of the career ladder.
My depression got worse and so did my health.
One day, during September 2009, I woke up one morning and decided to stop being depressed and started sleeping less(6-7 hours at most), almost curing my depression instantly.
And then it hit me!
During my struggle with depression for 6 & 1/2 years, I gained about 37 kg. Which was enough to make me want to go into another depression cycle, but I decided to face what happened and move on.
Then I started a lifestyle change, eating differently and exercising regularly. And since September last year i have lost only 6kg, but I am not losing hope. I will lose the other 31 kg too.
In December 2009 I resumed my love for writing, that I abandoned right before college(2004), to become a serious career person. And I am a truly happier person today. Because I am writing again, my health is better, mentally I am better and I have accepted that I am a more artistic person.
Today, like I said, before ranting on and on and on, I have my clean slate to start from again.
I have a place and wonderful people to share my writing with and I am finishing my latest temporary job in 2 weeks and I am doing something positive about losing my weight.
Remembering that I always have my writing to run too, already makes my day better.

No comments :

Post a Comment

Please leave a comment. I love comments.